So I decided to stay in a hotel near KLIA so that I can get to the airport early, and also I am scared that there will be no car around to pick me up to the airport at 6 o’ clock in the morning.
My life is an ocean of paranoia and I am just navigating through it with my best carrying my anxieties and melancholia on my back.
The hotel is nice, I like the decorations and ambiance. Really appeals to my aesthetics. I was carrying shit ton of stuff cos you know, a month in Europe and my paranoid ass just won’t know how to pack properly so I nearly brought the entire house, which I did not because I am a rational and sensible human being.
Sort of.
The lady at the reception is kind of rude but it’s okay. I won’t let her ruin my day. So after I placed my stuff in my room I went down to look for food cos you know, I don’t eat breakfast. There is not really much to eat here and as I was walking around to look for food I was being stared at, catcalled at, and it’s not a good feeling. Probably it’s cos I am the only Chinese lady walking around which I don’t really care but I don’t appreciate all of those. Then I found a small media runcit and I bought cup noodles. Two for RM12 and I was like wtf nooooo and the Indian guy operating the shop was like ‘yeah that’s the price’ and I was like if I didn’t buy then I won’t have stuff to eat so then I bought and I am sad.
I finished the two cup noodles and watched Bob’s Burger that I downloaded for a bit cos my stupid ass misunderstood the wifi password so I cannot watch Netflix. Sob sob.
Then halfway through I fell asleep cos I was exhausted cos I slept at around 6 the night before cos I was so nervous and so scared about everything and nothing.
I decided to not sleep so that I can be extremely tired so that I can sleep on the plane. Whew. It’s a morning flight so I doubt I can sleep. Oh well, we’ll see.
I am super excited and scared. My Airbnb host contacted me about the details and everything and I am like ‘is this even real I can’t believe this hohmaigawshh what what whaaaat.’
My dad called me just now and I was straight up bawling after he hung up cos I can tell he’s so worried about me and he misses me so much (since he’s alone in the house right now my mom and brother are in KK sorting out my brother’s college enrollment stuff) I miss my family so much and there are times that I really wish I can just chicken out and go home and be a baby. But I can’t now can I? The tickets and everything have been booked and the accommodation and the tuition fee (yeah I am going there for studies yo even tho one month but still) so I can’t just decide to turn back and go home.
Oh well.
Viele Grüße,
Delilah